I like looking at women. I enjoy seeing their personalities through their clothes. I guess it just fascinates me how seeing all the unique, beautiful women give the public a little introduction of who they are through the way they present themselves.
I'm going to be honest though. There are times when I don't understand why someone would wear something like whatever outfit he or she is in, but I am teaching myself to simply appreciate their unique sense of style, accept that it's a part of their individuality, end it there, and continue on my own merry way. Either that or I am unlearning making prejudiced assumptions on someone's whole being--more specifically the being of a
stranger--based on something as shallow as how she or he dresses up.
Biting my tongue when I have nothing nice to say is actually a good habit to practice when I observe the people surrounding me, but as you all know, it is not easy. I must admit, I still catch myself in those occasional glitches when I make an inside joke about whatever it is that I see, but I make sure I keep it to myself. If you come to think of it, it is definitely hard to prevent yourself from making biased assumptions. It's almost natural for us to just be snarky--even if indirectly--to strangers,
to people we haven't even met before. We do it anyway. We nudge our friend when we see something that is unusual or odd to us. But see, this bad habit of constantly judging others loudly (or not), or making a parody of other people's looks (features, body parts)--most especially fat people--has to end because nothing really good comes out from it.
Sadly, not everyone has resolved to zipping their mouths when they have nothing nice to say. I know A LOT of people, women and men alike, who just can't do away with the ugly habit of uttering comments that are very mocking and insulting to other people's styles. Others are usually mean to fat people who opt to break the so-called rules regarding what they can or cannot wear that are heavily enforced on them by the society, making it seem as if they've committed a very offensive crime when they choose to disobey. What's even more horrible are those people who unthinkingly say mean things based on someone's
physical appearance, pointing out what they don't like and making a mockery out of it for their pure entertainment.
I was browsing through the photo albums posted by an online swimwear shop, and I came across this particular photo.
TRANSLATION
(2nd comment) Posted at 06 April at 17:42-- "The audacity of that woman in the red two-piece! If that's the competition, then I can certainly wear a two-piece myself! Hahahaha! As long as she's the one beside me in photos! Hahahaha!"
(4th comment) Posted at 07 April at 13:10-- "Then I can wear one [bikini] too! As long she's the one with me [in photos]..."
I'm sure the person who started mocking the fat woman for being in a bikini wasn't trying to be mean. She was, of course, just trying to be
funny. But seriously, what if the tables were turned and other people were the ones making jokes at her expense?
At her body's expense? Would she find the whole situation funny still? I think not.
Honestly speaking, I think people who are
mapanglait (insulting, ridiculing) are insecure, aside from rude. Because if they really are secure within themselves, then they wouldn't have the need to insult other people. They wouldn't have the need to put other people down just to feel better about themselves. They wouldn't have the need to pick on other people's unique individuality to have a sense of satisfaction or whatever it is that they get out of it. (Case in point: Read the 2nd and 4th comment on the photo above.)
Maybe some are just trying to be funny, and the best way they can think of being hilarious is to criticize others and jokingly mock their looks. If so, it just means that their sense of humor would constantly need other people for them to poke fun at, and seriously, those types of people need to start being original.
Just because a body is in public doesn't mean it's publicly open for a little "funny" telling off. We should learn to respect other people's choices on how they want to decorate their bodies because after all, that's what makes us all unique and distinct from one another.
We should learn when to bite our tongues and think first about the impact of the words we will utter. You might want to consider the fact that you don't know a single thing about the person you're about to criticize, so needless to say, assuming anything is pointless. The fat woman who opts to wear a sexy outfit that you think is so shamelessly disgusting of her to even think of fitting her body in such clothing could be a single mom who has just decided to love herself more and feel beautiful by getting a makeover. The skinny girl you assume to be Anorexic could be coming from a family that's just naturally thin no matter how much food they eat. The girl you call ugly because her face is covered in acne is probably having self-esteem issues already because of something that is completely out of her control.
I know the issue at hand can be easily justified by saying that the people you decide to pick apart won't even know they're being mocked because you do it behind their backs. But seriously, do you really want to be THAT kind of person? The kind whose expertise is ridiculing, mocking, and insulting people? The kind who makes fun of other people because they look the way they do? Because believe me, even if you think this is something you do
just for fun, it will become a habit, and habits eventually become a part of your character. You'd end up being overly critical and judgmental, and you'd start assuming that other people do it to you too. It's such a negative way to go through life.
If we all learn to to speak nothing but positive, kind, and sincere words of affirmation to one another, this world will be a better place full of happy and confident women. And we all want that world, don't we? :)
Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless.
--Mother Teresa
Be beautiful inside and out,
Stacy
